Finances and dating

Some of you might be dating someone whom you are thinking about marrying. You might have been dating for awhile but have never discussed money. You don’t have a clue about the other person’s finances. Before you decide to marry someone, you need to discuss finances. What if you are a saver and they’re a spender? What if they have a mountain of student loan debt or consumer debt? Do they live paycheck-to-paycheck?

Don’t be afraid to discuss money issues with your fiancee. It is better to go in with your eyes wide-open rather than with eyes shut. Sit down and tell each other how much debt you have. Discuss how much savings you have. Talk about how you feel about giving. Do not assume the other person’s debt just because you’re going to get married soon. Don’t cosign for anything before you’re married. If the other person is unwillingly to discuss their finances with you before you get married, think twice about marrying that person. What are they hiding?

Decide before you get married how you are going to handle your finances together. I don’t believe that you should keep separate bank accounts. You are going to become one when you get married.

The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”  That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Genesis 2: 23-24

Some of you might have been told to keep a separate checking or savings account and a joint account to pay your bills. How is that becoming one flesh? Create a spending plan together. Decide if you are able to live on one income or maybe one income and half of the other. Save the other portion of the that income for a home. If you are able to live on one income, when you decide it’s time to have children and the wife takes maternity leave, you won’t miss that second income. They key is to plan ahead and discuss how you are going to treat your money. Do this before you’re married and you’ll avoid conflict created by money.

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